Sometimes it feels like I am taking great steps backwards.
As I think back over the last few years of my life, I often think about where I would have been, if I hadn't have taken so many steps backwards.
This past week I was kind of stuck on that.
What I have come through, where I am going. Moments of feeling anything but progressive, and everything like time wasted.
In a holding pattern.
As I was *working through this* with the Lord, I instantly saw a picture of a sling shot appear in my mind.
"You weren't regressing, you were catapulting."
Sometimes the things that we see as the biggest set backs in life, aren't that at all.
They are the tension that is drawing you backwards, so that you can be launched into the future thing you wouldn't have accessed, unless you had the pullback.
I am learning that often times when we say yes to God, He will walk us through seasons that aren't even necessarily for us, but so that when others walk them, we can take out our itinerary from that journey, and guide them through it.
And it feels a lot like regression.
Slingshots aren't meant to hurl large objects. They require small, light, and seemingly unimportant things, to function properly.
When I looked up what the best things for sling shots to launch, almost everyone said "If it is something small, light, and well rounded, your accuracy will be much better."
When you make a decision to be used by God, you choose to bow low. Becoming humble and useful in His hands. Small, in the presence of a big God.
A lot of us come to Him with rough edges. We are anything but smooth. The jealousy, anger, need for attention, or being right - they are all harsh responses, that keep us in rough shape.
He asks us to shake off the heavy things.
The anxiety, depression, worry, doubt, and fear. So we can be set free. Weightless, and light.
And when He works out our imperfections, with His perfect love, He can use us.
It takes time. And He is so patient, and set on doing it right. He's not in a rush.
"Now I'm ready God, I can feel it. Use me. Send me. Give me a purpose. A blessing. A breakthrough, I'll take any of it!"
We feel his hands picking us up, and placing us in His purposes. Secure in Him.
And just when we think that we have arrived, we feel the tension.
The pull of the sling shot taking us backwards.
One hand pulling us back, the other hand stabilizing the sling, and His eye on the destination, where He is launching us.
I told my husband that I had never felt such exponential spiritual growth in all of my life, like I have on the last 6 months. I thought maybe God was just giving me a summer school class on life, to make up for all of the lost time, and failed assignments.
All of the steps backwards.
Now I am seeing that He was preparing and teaching me, the whole time.
He doesn't have to make up for what I didn't do right, He takes it all from the onset to the end, and He uses it for my good.
He is outside of time, and seasons. He sees it all as our collective journey. And He isn't concerned with when we get to where we are going, but rather the state in which we arrive, when we get there.
He picks us up.
He prepares us.
He holds us in His hand.
He conditions us.
He makes sure we are light, small, and well rounded.
And just when we think that we are too far gone, and have travelled a million steps backwards, He releases us from the sling, and launches us.
Using us from the onset.
Placing tension on us for a season.
Launching us in an instant.
Preparing us the whole time.
Catapulting us into our destiny. 🏹